16 april 2010

from Darkness to Light


i.

i am not sure when it was that i became lost
i only remember the darkness,
the absence of my soul.


ii.

the way you treated me as a child taught me how to treat my self
when i left and entered the world how i treated my self is also how i unknowingly treated others.
I would wonder why I felt alone, unloved, abused..
never realizing the connection.

it was not until i saw the reflection of you in every one around me,
particularly my self,
that i was able
to change.


iii.

i recognize the dreams that have vanished
the potential i felt wasted,
the disappointment of
my circumstance.

i accept that my life has been difficult
and that i allowed the weight of it to bury me.

i have learned to rise up,
to believe in something better and
to cherish hope.

i embrace the changes that desperately need to take place
feel pride for having taken a stand
and watch myself achieve greatness proudly and happily.


i am so thankful for all of this.



iv.

your vulnerability was beautiful
and how i wished i could be the same

but,
each time i'd built a connection
with someone
it faltered
leaving me
feeling

even more
alone

so,
i did not let you in.

i fear you feel i did not want to
when, truly,

i just didn't know how.


v.

despite the honesty i pride my self on
being with you made me realize
all the lies i still told myself
each time you spoke to me


vi.

please,
inspire me to be something greater than i am.
show me a path i never knew existed
take my hand and lead me screaming,
joy.

help me have the faith i've never know
awaken me to a confidence that lies somewhere deep within me
shatter my perceptions and birth within me
hope.


vii.

the pressure to choose weighs heavily upon me
all i really want to do is exist
yet every where i go must be a destination
every act a deliberate choice

when is it that i can be free?
will time one day be my companion
rather than this chain that binds me?

i am infinite.
all things and no things, all in one.
to choose is to give one part of me permission to exist
while silently damning an other

to not


viii.

i feel uncomfortable as i take this moment for my self.
Not Doings feels Not Right
it used to be the other way around...

i miss those days
when the priority was me.
Now I don't even know what to do with her
she's learned to sit down and shut up
so polite and accommodating
no more personality or passion.

all she does is wait
quietly
for the next
task / assignment / order / obligation
to be carried

out


ix.

you chose to know me which caused me to know my self
without your interest i would have been left wandering
so lost and so alone

i had become accustomed to the over looking
and did not realize i had overlooked my self..

thank you for waking me up.


x.

allow the child within you to thrive
practice curiousity
let go of restraint
feel joy!

be infectious
smile!
lead by example

be exactly who you want to be
this very minute!
stop
wasting
time


xi.

love
who
you
are
you
are
perfect
stand
amazed
by all
you have
accomplished
be
inspired
by all
you will
achieve
believe
that
greatness
lies
within
you
and
feel
the
glory
of
that
knowledge
be
unafraid
to
stand up
speak out
shout
and charge
accept
your
infinite
nature
and
revel
in
the
possibility
of
all
that is
and
will be


xii.

There are only two choices in life.

1. To deny something; to choose to put it below the surface; to ignore it until a later time.
2. To embrace something; to choose to bring it forward; to analyze it until you reach understanding.

There are only two choices in life.

1. To perpetuate it.
2. To terminate it.

Your choice.


xiii.

when we are unconscious we reflect
unknowingly
the behaviors that occur around us.

when we are conscious we choose
deliberately
the behaviors that will define us.


xiv.

on the surface we all appear to be so different but,
if you take just a moment to peel back the surface,
it's easy to see that we want the same things.

truth ~ love ~ happiness

the struggle to see the similarities is the challenge in life.
it is a beautiful challenge and, when met with patience and compassion,

easy to conquer.


xv.

shed this skin for it contains you
without it we are free
to move, to expand, to breathe

when we are transient our potential is limitless.
we have the ability to do and be
every thing

so, let go of what is familiar
of all the little things that confine and define you
grow infinite and marvel everyone

especially,
your self.



heart.